1. |
i wanna make me smile
03:14
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|
I wanna make me smile
I wanna make me happy
In my dreams I’m that girl
But I’m not living in that world
I want to be seen the way she seems
But In the wrong skin and the right jeans
I don’t like the way I sound when I don’t like the way I look
I would rather wear a flower crown
Than burn the pages of my book
She might do it better than me right now
But I’m learning I’m learning somehow
do it better than me right now
But I’m learning learning, learning learning
I wanna make me smile
I wanna make me happy
I gotta take what I can get
A little bit of that
A little bit of this
Bodies swinging swinging swinging
swinging swinging swinging
swinging off the rails
off the rails
The way you ripped you up
In your mind
All the time
Not fair to the rest of us
|
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2. |
move me up
02:36
|
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|
did someone say this is it?
this is it
did someone fade? i forget
step into a softer skin
flecks of dust will bind you in
where will it take me
where will we go
where will it save me
will I follow? follow
move me up
let me down
up
let me down
what i need from you right now
right now
don't hurry me
don't rush me out
move me up
i'm settling in
let me down
up
i'm settling in
let me down
this is how my story begins
step into a softer skin
flecks of dust will bind you in
|
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3. |
worker bee
02:30
|
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|
my voice is
mine to give
my choices
I did what I did
you can only hope to be what you wanna be
and i am, mostly
do you wanna be a good worker bee
will this help you fall asleep?
and survive
one more day
one more night
keep running
keep keep running in place
don't we wanna make the grade?
keep running
keep keep running in place
everything will be okay
|
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4. |
i'm the one
02:30
|
|||
|
i'm the one
nothing is wrong with me
nothing is wrong
I got to you as fast as I could
I fought to keep you safe as best I understood
there were too many forces in the woods
too many forces in the woods
both times the police arrived I was surprised
couldn't make my talk seem sound
I was so far gone I couldn't admit I'd done anything wrong
|
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5. |
real dreams
02:40
|
|||
|
I leap from the tower
fly over the city
searching for something
memory so pretty
waking each morning (in her dream)
shaking and sweating (in my dream)
spent the night running (in their dream)
lying in bed (i'm my dream)
under the streetlight
clenching my fists tight
I see it’s you and I and I
I look you in the eye
Miss me (I say)
don’t you miss me (she says)
don't you miss me (we say)
don’t you miss me (anyways)
I reach out for your form
I really could have sworn
this was real and
I don’t want real
this was real and
I don’t want real
sinking in quicksand
pulling me under
I reach out for your hand
lightning and thunder
awake in my bed (in her dream)
drenched from the fever (in my dream)
consumed by dread (in their dream)
the images linger (i'm my dream)
miss me
don't you miss me
don't you miss me
don't you miss me
I reach out for your form
I really could have sworn
this was real and
I don’t want real
this was real and
I don’t want real
this was real and
I don’t want real
this was real and
I don’t want real
|
||||
6. |
melody
03:36
|
|||
|
every day
I search high and low
for a new kind of melody
one that you can sink your teeth into
and finally be proud of me
but I know my time is short
and the road to riches is serpentine
and you know when your ship's in port
no more digging ditches or overtime
you just say goodbye
crossed this country a dozen times
strumming chords and spouting rhymes
looking 'round every corner for the next great line
or maybe it's just you I'll find
now it's too late
water passed this bridge
way back when
I'm still less than great
hits not smashed
a tinge of fame again
and I just wonder why
I just wonder why
every day
I search high and low
for a new kind of melody
one that you can sink your teeth into
and finally be proud of me
proud of me
every day
I search high and low
for a new kind of melody
one that you can sink your teeth into
and finally be proud of me
proud of me
|
||||
7. |
call me back
02:53
|
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|
I’ll try to act like friends who have their life sorted out ahead of them
futures so bright no darkness in sight
doesn’t my name
mean something to you
sent a message out of state
and I know it got through
wish you were a friend who’d call me back
wish you were a friend who’d get attached
"when you started singing I was like okay, yeah, yeah, that low range, that's pretty impressive, that's really cool, and I like the sound right now, and then you went up an octave and my brain exploded, and I was so happy"
future so bright no darkness in sight
future so bright no darkness in sight
you should call me a mistake
I was not an heiress even before I was replaced
I’ve changed my name and stayed in the same old estate
a nightmare nearing twenty-eight
anyways
I hope we can talk soon
I hope we can talk soon
|
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8. |
everyone
02:56
|
|||
|
I won't be afraid
my brain won't stay the same
I won't be dissuaded
from the paths we conflated
get out of my head
I will not be yours again
everyone's always been you
and I know that it's not true
I just want to sing along
get out of my head
I will not be yours again
everyone's always been you
and I know that it's not true
I just want everyone to sing along
I won't be afraid
to sing along
I just want to sing along
|
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9. |
keeps
03:21
|
|||
|
you’re seeing what I see
you’re seeing it all for free
don’t you have something to say to me
it’s all yours and it’s all for keeps
it’s all yours and it’s all for keeps
why am I always gonna be me
you’re feeling what I feel
but what exactly is your deal?
I need help to heal
why am I always gonna be me
why am I always gonna be me
you can stay in my brain
I can’t erase your pain
my love for you is what remains
my love for you is what remains
you’re not always gonna be you
if you’re seeing what I see
then you’re seeing it all with me
do you have somewhere else to be
it’s all yours and it’s all for keeps
it’s all yours and it’s all for keeps
you’re seeing what I see
seeing it all for free
|
||||
10. |
over now
05:15
|
|||
|
you saw into me like no one else
we spoke like children escaping hell
you saw into me like no one else
you saw into me like no one else
where was the downside of it all
where was the downside of it all
I never was afraid to take a fall
over now
over now
I’ll explain
all mixed up
I’ll explain
no meaning, no no meaning
they maintain the pain of leaving
where were the contents of your call
there was the downside of it all
i never was afraid to take the fall
over now
over now
It’s been over for a while
It’s been over for a while
they maintain the pain of leaving
there was the downside of it all
i never was afraid to take the fall
over now
over now
it's been over for a while
we can’t go back to being friends
|
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Evelyn Landow Hinsdale, Illinois
musician|filmmaker
she/her
evelynlandow
@gmail.com
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